What is Resiliency?

Everyone faces their own unique obstacles in life. The ability to show strength and overcome adversities is defined as resiliency. Since everyone experiences different roadblocks, resiliency looks different to every individual. What’s universal about it is the skills an individual possesses to cope and adapt to challenges. It is what gives people the strength to cope and overcome setbacks. Students who express resiliency are able to move forward despite facing hardship or tragedy. Conversely, a student who lacks resiliency may become “stuck” after facing adversity and have a harder time bouncing back. Keep in mind that resilience does not refer to the intensity in which an individual feels after a negative event but rather how they deal with it. It is innate, meaning we were born with it; however, how much of it you use and how you apply it is the question. We can all learn to grow this skill, much like any other human skill. All you need is the willingness to do so. 

Why is it important for students?

Stress and adversity are inevitable. Although this is not something, we can control, resilience is. The difference between a student who preservers through difficult tasks and achieves their goals versus a kid who refuses to try and gets frustrated is their resilient mindset. They are able to embrace difficult times and turn them into a learning experience rather than a problem. Student well-being, academic success and personal growth are tied to resiliency. Often, this mindset was a determining factor in student success. In equivalent academic obstacles, few students fostered the skills and applied them in order to overcome and reach success, whereas others fell victim to the hardship. Aside from academic success, resilience can also be a factor in mental health. A student’s ability to see an adverse situation as positive versus negative plays into psychological distress. An inability to cope may lead to depressive symptoms and extreme levels of stress and anxiety. An individual’s capacity to cope and even thrive after adversity is what sets them apart.

How can students build resiliency?

The 7 C’s

Dr Ken Ginsburg, MD, and the American Academy of Pediatrics developed a model of resilience to help kids and teens build this skill. All seven are centred around the fact that youth either fail or live up to the expectations set for them. Adults are important in holding them to these expectations and supporting them.

1. Competence - Knowing and understanding how to handle situations effectively.

2. Confidence

3. Connection – Staying close to family and friends for support and security, a sense of belonging.

4. Character – this is the fundamental sense of right and wrong and possessing the ability to make responsible choices.

5. Contribution – Contribution to society may serve as a motivator and develops a sense of purpose.

6. Coping – Being better able to cope means being better prepared to face adversity.

7. Control – Internal control plays a big role in developing resiliency. Once an individual learns they are in control of their decisions and how that impacts the outcome, they are more likely to feel confident and capable.

Self-Awareness

Knowing yourself and understanding how you respond to stress is very important. You must be aware of your strengths and weaknesses in order to face them and change yourself for the better. Identify how adversity makes you feel and why. Further, identify what you may do when presented with stress. Make a note of your innate and initial reactions. Be honest with yourself because this is the first step in acknowledging a lack of resiliency and, from there, becoming stronger.

An Open Mind

Students who have adopted an open mindset tend to believe that with hard work, effort and perseverance, they can grow and improve. In order to develop resiliency, you must also adopt a similar mindset. If you are closed off to new ideas and believe your abilities cannot be changed, there is no room for development or resiliency.

Identifying the Alternatives

Once you have identified possible stressors and how you respond, you may want to think about other, more efficient ways to cope. This may not necessarily mean practising and employing them right away, but just becoming aware of the alternatives to reacting poorly. Do some research on different mechanisms people use to cope. Again, resiliency is different for everyone, so make sure you are finding the right techniques for your unique mindset. Create a list of strategies you personally find helpful! This compilation can be useful in the future as you can turn to it when faced with adversity and, from there, gradually begin to demonstrate resiliency. 

Practice Coping Skills 

Though it might not come easy to you, practice makes perfect. After identifying the coping skills that work best for you, applying them can initiate that resilient mindset. Also, remember that in order to practice coping, it does not require experiencing adversity. Skills such as journaling, reframing thoughts, improving sleep habits, mindfulness training, exercising, etc., can be applied outside of crisis. If they are learned and used before facing hardship, you are more likely to employ them during adversity. They are no longer a new concept to you, and through practice, you have a greater understanding of how they can help you deal with the challenge.

Perspective

Perspective is everything. Individuals who possess a more optimistic outlook on life tend to feel they have more control over their outcomes. It is important to maintain a hopeful outlook and see that the situation can be perceived in a different light. This optimistic perspective can enable you to focus on the positives of the situation, no matter how adverse the situation may be. Understand that life does move forward after bad events, and the worst things in life are specific and temporary. To build a better perspective, focus on what you can do when faced with a challenge and what positive steps you can take.

Learn How to Fail

Nothing is perfect because perfection is impossible. Throughout your lifetime, you will inevitably experience failure, whether that be academic, career setbacks, or relationships, so it is important to know how to react and overcome this. This is directly related to the optimistic perspective we mentioned above. Do not you see failure as purely a fault in your skills and abilities but rather a step back from success? Learning from mistakes provides opportunities for personal development and ultimately leads to success. Embracing imperfection allows your resilient mindset to flourish. Once you can see that failure is not the be-all-end-all, you can move forward and start again. When you learn to accept it for what it is, you will understand the value failure holds.

Accept Change 

Change can be scary, no matter how old you are. Change is another part of life that is inevitable – it can’t stay the same way forever! The goals we create in life sometimes turn out to be unattainable. We must accept that and alter aspirations to make them more achievable. Different aspects of life are ever-changing, but you cannot let the fear of uncertainty and having to face something new stop you. You must understand that change stimulates personal growth. Without adapting and overcoming new challenges, you will never build resiliency.

Go Outside of Your Comfort Zone

In order to develop resiliency, you must experience adversity. It is unlikely that you will confront hardship if you stay within your comfortable limits. If you don’t encounter events that challenge you, personal growth will never occur. Students are more likely to reach their full potential when pushed to their limits, as this is where you learn the most! Being comfortably uncomfortable is a lifelong skill that leads to ultimate success. 

Asking for Support

Although resiliency is about overcoming obstacles and coming out the other side – it is just not logical to be able to do this every single time. It’s okay to fall back sometimes and reach out for support. Don’t expect to have to take on adversity alone. There are many independent coping skills you may learn to apply, but challenges vary in severity, and you should not be ashamed to seek support when times are very tough.

Developing resiliency is a personal and complex journey; however, once attained, it is a life-changing skill. The challenges we all face in life are now a little less intimidating and are valuable to our personal development, not just a burden. Learning to live free of the fear of adversity can be very liberating, allowing any individual to thrive and achieve any successes they may dream of.